Are You Experiencing An Emotional Cliffhanger?
Yesterday, a man asked me: “What do I do if I reached out to someone and she never responded?”
He had written an email letter to his female romantic interest who he told me is a “kind and genuine” woman who had indicated she wanted to hear from him.
What he wrote her was thoughtful, authentic, and not off-putting in any way.
She never responded.
One month later this loving man was on an emotional cliffhanger.
He was speculating about why she didn’t write back, what she thought of him, or was he lucky she didn’t and did he ‘dodge a bullet’ so-to-speak, and on and on…
Then his confusion turned to worry, then to self-doubt, which is heartbreaking.
“So what do you think?” he asked me.
I replied: “You are feeling vulnerable since you were way out of your comfort zone. And since you know she received your email, at the very least it would have been polite if she acknowledged that.”
He grinned, “Yes!”
“I continued, “Yet…” to which I saw his instant frown.
“You never know what is going on in someone’s life. There are times a person might not be capable of doing what seems to ‘be right’ in your opinion. She made a choice and that is her prerogative. Please lean into compassion, for her and for yourself. And lean on God/Goddess.” I said.
“And what is your guidance?” he asked.
What was my guidance to him?
This is a hard lesson, yet here it is: No one can make you feel any specific way.
Absolutely no one can!
We each are responsible for our own emotions, thoughts, and feelings. Period.
If he can detach from his desire for a specific outcome and any expectations then he frees himself to remain firmly planted in the knowledge that the Universe (interchangeable with other words such as Source, God/Goddess etc.) is handling everything in everyone’s Highest Good.
This liberation of giving it over to Universe keeps him from the emotional cliffhanger of the “Why’s” or “When’s” or “What If’s.”
In doing this, he takes back his personal power to choose his life experiences and how he wants to feel.
His happiness no longer depends on anything outside of himself, instead of identifying his life from ego, he experiences his life as his true Divine Self, which is Divine Love, an inner-connection that makes you feel Alive! This is Freedom.
With that shift he can live in the moment, the Now, fully immersed in the Joy to co-create his Beautiful Life with Love, Appreciation, and Gratitude. He is Happy.
He Trusts and has Faith that the person who is right for him who he is right for, will share that with him.
He has walked off the emotional cliffhanger back onto land.
Four Life Lessons Learned From Moving Past An Emotional Cliffhanger:
1. Only You Hold The Key To Your Emotional Well-Being: If you seek validation from anyone or any situation other than yourself it is a dead-end street. This dynamic most often stems from a lack of self-esteem, and it can be cyclic. If someone appears to validate you, you feel good, if they don’t, you don’t feel good. This is an emotional rollercoaster ride of ups and downs that no one wants a ticket to.
2. Love Yourself, Just Because You Exist! No one else can give you this. You don’t have to earn self-love or love of any kind. If you don't love yourself, you will never fully believe and trust that anyone else can love you. Period. It doesn't matter what s/he says, does, or doesn’t do. You Are Worthy Of Love!
3. Believe The People You Love Will Love You Back. What thoughts or beliefs about yourself are being mirrored back to you in this situation? Do you feel unworthy of love? Do you believe that any person you love will always be at an arms’ length? Do you lack trust?
4. Rise Above The Drama. This is about accepting yourself. Be proud that you did something that felt brave to you. That you did step out of your comfort zone. You would have regretted it if you hadn’t tried! Love Yourself!
Copyright © 2017 by Zoe Summer. Zoe Summer is an inspirational author and empowering speaker who teaches people how to live life to its fullest, and is known as "The Feel Great Expert." Zoe Summer is also the Author and Artist of the book "YOU ARE ENOUGH: 30 Mini Mantras for Self-Transformation, Be Empowered, Enlightened, and Inspired” available on Amazon. To learn about personal development: Subscribe to her “Heart Connection Blog” and visit her online: http://www.ZoeSummer.com.